• Tag Archives Comrade Viigand
  • Musicals – Chess – The Soviet Machine lyrics

    Molokov: [Spoken]
    Comrades, why are you looking so worried? We are not
    Dealing with the traitor Sogievsky now. Comrade Viigand
    Is a disciplined, Soviet, chess-playing machine.

    [Sung]
    Just in case you feel a trace
    Of doubt or even nervous tension,
    Let me draw the latest score
    To your attention.
    Not the score,
    The witless core of commentators are debating.
    Come, admit,
    Who gives a shit for Elo rating.
    No, I prefer
    And I’m sure you concur,
    To see who is ahead
    Psychologically, for example,
    We have on tap,
    An inscrutable chap
    Whose thoughts never stray
    From the state of the play.

    All:
    Viigand!

    Molokov: [Spoken]
    Whereas…

    [Sung]
    It’s so difficult to concentrate if
    You have left your native
    Country for a woman
    Who has plans of her own.
    It’s not easy for a chap to excel,
    Feeling guilty as hell,
    Having left his wife
    To face the music alone.
    But, even worse,
    Imagine if his ladies met,
    Well then I’ll bet,
    The atmosphere ’round here
    Would be a little strained,
    As she explained.
    [Claps]
    How could he do
    What he’s done to those two,
    Most wonderful girls.
    Yes, I love you both.

    Soloists:
    Most amusing!

    Molokov:
    Starting them scratch
    They’ll torpedo his match,
    His horsepower dead
    On the board and in bed.

    All:
    Bit by bit the pieces fit,
    The Soviet machine advances.
    Not one move that
    Won’t improve our nation’s chances.
    We predict a stunning victory
    On the board and off it.
    This will show that traitor
    No one rats with profit.

    But we’re going
    To smash that bastard.
    Make him wanna change his name.
    Take him to the cleaners
    And devastate him,
    Wipe him out,
    Humiliate him.

    We don’t want the
    Whole world saying
    “They can’t even win a game.”
    We have never
    Reckoned on coming second.

    Molokov:
    There’s no use in Soloists:
    Losing. We can feel the flame
    Of triumph burning,
    Bit by bit the pieces fit, Our people’s pride returning.
    The soviet machine
    Advances.

    All:
    Not one move that won’t
    Improve our nation’s chances.
    Hoi!

    Molokov:
    No, I prefer and
    I’m sure you concur,
    To see who is ahead
    Psychologically, for example,
    We have on tap,
    An inscrutable chap
    Whose thoughts never stray
    From the state of the play.

    All:
    La la la la, la la lay la lay la
    La la la la la la la la la la la

    Bit by bit the pieces fit,
    The soviet machine advances.
    Not one move that won’t
    Improve our nation’s chances.
    Hey!
    We predict a stunning victory
    On the board and off it.
    This will show that traitor
    No one rats with profit.

    Ah ah, la la la la!

    Molokov:
    From Moscow to
    The Bering Strait,
    Citizens will hail
    Our victory.

    All:
    In arctic circles,
    Frozen states
    Will join with
    Warmer climes in reverie.

    Molokov:
    And I can say of this affair
    I was there,
    Did my share,
    Played my part.

    All:
    And comrades
    All will be aware
    I was there
    From the start
    Mmm mmm…

    Viigand:
    Ah ah…